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“Human Comparison: The Futile Flaw of Self Esteem- Rachel Joffe aka the “Thera-Patient”

Why does my body have a direct impact on how you view me? Does my body have an impact at all on how you view me or is it how I feel in my head that I am projecting how you view me? When you speak about your diet are you sharing because I need that information and you are hoping that I start using it? Or… are you just excited by what you are doing? If I am present in myself and I am in a place that I accept myself as is, flawed and growing, then your stuff shares no bearing. If I am in a place of self-doubt (put gently) then your share has every impact on my life and it dictates all that I am not. Which way will my pendulum swing today? Will it flow towards the perfectly imperfect self that I have become who appreciates my successes and strives to be even stronger? Or…. Will it swing towards the self that has not completed all their goals, that has had fluctuations, and setbacks and is not as good as the person that appears to be successful in every way? Do I believe that I have a choice or is this just a random occurrence?
If you have a history of or a propensity to be overweight or are compulsive with food, the likelihood is you have had fluctuations, setbacks, triumphs and changes. Your physical self will change, your mechanical self will change, your spiritual self will change and your emotional health will change. It is impossible to stay static in any of these areas- energy cannot be static. It is a scientific fact!
So why then are we so hard on ourselves when we are where we are at in our journeys? Human comparison… It is the futile flaw that only the human species engage in. “I am not enough” “ I am not as good as…” “I should be this and ought to be that..” What is success? Can it be small? Can it be gradual? Can it be present even when there has been a setback or a stagnation? Is success a finish line or a hurdle jumped? When we compare ourselves we never get to feel what success is. In fact often it can stop us dead in our tracks.
So swing your pendulum- Are you present? Or are you where you believe that you “should be?” Your experiences are your choice- you create your thoughts- that also means that you have a huge impact on how you experience your experiences. Which way will you swing today?